I've had an interesting life, having always been one to stand out from the crowd and do things different. Sadly my body feels the same way and decided to hit me with swollen, painful knees around 1996. A private consultant told me it was arthritis but he didn't want to specify "which one" because should he be wrong the insurance wouldn't cover any further treatment. He suspected osteoarthritis and prescribed huge doses of ibuprofen.

After reading what such huge doses could do (800mg x 4 daily) I did some research and cut out nightshade and acididic foods. Lo! within a month the agonising, burning, grinding pain had gone and I could walk again without crying.

Three years later I found myself walking in the middle of the road with no idea how I got there. It wasn't a brain tumour, I was reassured after numerous similar episodes, vertigo and severe headaches and blurred vision forced me to seek a consultant. It's probably Meniere's Disease, I was told. "Here's a leaflet. Go and see the Tinnitus clinic and come back if it gets worse." In 2003 it did and I revisited the consultant only to be told I was a hypochondriac and to quite simply bugger off and stop wasting his time.

By then I'd already suffered for a while with what I thought was osteo in the wrists and fingers but a career change with less typing seemed to resolve that issue and I promptly forgot about it until 2008 when I woke up one morning in Barcelona in so much agony I thought I'd dislocated a toe. By the time I got back to blighty it had disappeared apart from the odd twinge when I positioned my feet awkwardly. It returned six months later but by the time I got to the GP the swelling and redness had disappeared. I was reassured it wasn't gout and for the first time I began to have a nagging suspicion it could be rheumatoid arthritis.

In 2009 severe pain and swelling developed in my thumbs and forefingers on a trip to London. By now I was beginning to wonder why I only got ill on holiday. I was already using a walking stick for the Meniere's I didn't have so walking was very, very difficult. The pain promptly disappeared the second I returned home and reappeared a month later on a research trip to Belfast. "You can fry those eggs on my hands if you like," I said to the waitress as we ordered our Belfast fry. Such was the agony I had to ask my husband to cut my food as I was unable to use a knife and fork.

Finally I sought medical help at around the same time I woke up with severe pain (but no heat or swelling) in my right shoulder. My GP was on holiday so I saw a locum, a bone surgeon apparently, who was an expert in 'these things' who told me I had a frozen shoulder and I was too young to have arthritis and there was no sign of it anyway. Two weeks later a return visit to my very capable GP resulted in me being taken off the toxic painkillers I'd been prescribed to a softer analgesic and a rapid appointment with a rheumatologist and physiotherapist.

To cut a long story short, after some argy bargy about whether I had psioratic arthritis or not I was treated with steroids and the various forms of rheumatoid arthritis were discussed. From then until November my hands went up and down like a balloon at a kids' party until finally the swelling and stiffness was bad enough to get me a diagnosis of seronegative inflammatory arthritis. It had literally taken less than 6 months for the diagnosis so I understand I've been very lucky.

I also realise I've been very typical in taking 10 years to get a diagnosis of Meniere's Disease. The tests I had last year confirmed it. Deterioration of my inner ear on the right and it's in the left as well. So yay for me, I get diagnoses of two chronic, disabling diseases within three months of each other. Good job I'm tough skinned.

But I digress. A quick experiment in Sulfasalazine resulted in me nearly losing my skin to a nasty dose of Stevens-Johnson syndrome and some urgent tests to see if my liver/kidneys were damaged. Apparently they're not but I had months of problems with my skin which still recurrs from time to time and an overnight inability to hold my liquor which was never a problem before.

I refused further medication other than steroids and analgesics after that until earlier this year things deteriorated and I realised I had no damn choice.

I'm now on my fourth week of MXT and currently on 10mg after a starter dose for two weeks at 7.5mg. I'm up to 12.5mg next week for two weeks and then - well, you know the story.

I look back now and begin to see there's a definite pattern with all these niggling aches, pains, swelling, "RSI" and other strange ailments I've suffered since 1996. I also believe the Meniere's Disease results from the same autoimmune disorder that's now nibbling away at my joints and in fact that was probably the first symptom. One of its causes can be rheumatoid arthritis so it seems to make sense.

This blog will help me to keep my sanity as I enter the hurdy gurdy world of methotrexate and God knows what else I need to do to control this betrayal by my immune system.

So far nothing. No sickness, nausea on the second week only and nothing since, no headaches, no more tiredness than I'm used to. Maybe it's early days yet but I can report my hands have actually gotten worse which is interesting. Ho hum.

This is Maggie, last survivor of the Sulfasalazine signing off ....

(I'm an insufferable sci-fi geek by the way)

Hi Maggie

Sorry you are feeling so down at the moment, but unless you have experienced the feeling of broken hands I really don't believe people will understand what you are going through and to be honest I don't expect them to, I was only diagnosed recently but the painful hands started last July and I also told people that the pain was so bad that at times I wanted to chop of my fingers, I was told it was a trapped nerve by the first doctor I saw.

Saying that I was brought up quite harsly, not alot of sympathy as a child with regards to illness or emotions, I still havn't told my parents about my RA because I don't feel able to discuss it with them, and I would find it hard to receive any sympathy from them. I have told my husband not to ask me everyday how I am, I have told him that I will tell him if I am unable to cope, and he can see when I'm struggling.

I wouldn't say its ignorance but people just don't understand, to be honest if someone told me before I had this, that they had RA I would have thought it was a few aches and pains, I would suggest that people who you really want to understand what you are going through, people close to you, give them the booklet about RA so they can have a good read.

Try not to worry to much about the future, I to have worried alot over the past few weeks about what will happen to me, but the advice I have received on here from people who have lived with this awful disease for years has really helped. I now feel lucky as a person who has been fit and healthy all her life not have caught it until I was 50.

I'm sure you will have better days. Anne x

Hi Maggie,

Instead of the mallet carry the booklet, you are gonna have to learn to say no, because your health is more important and those who disappear in a puff of green smoke never to be seen again well are they really that important in your life.

Take care Anne x

Maggie, the problem is that you have always BEEN THERE and now you want to cut down on the work you do, no one understands. Good old Maggie, lets call her, she'll cover for Tom/Dick or Harry!!
But Maggie cant do it anymore!! They wont understand, they CANT understand, its not them, so why would they want to?
Sorry, but honestly, thats how it is. You have more than done enough, now you need some understanding and empathy, they need to listen. Hand out the leaflets on RA, tell them to read up on why you cant do it anymore.
Start being selfish, they wont like it, but too bad!! Take care x x

I'm on my second week at 12.5mg and six weeks into MTX in general. This time I suffered some mild nausea, headache and exhaustion possibly due to taking it late after a long weekend away in Pembrokeshire.

So far buggerall has happened other than the RA has deteriorated rapidly and significantly. I was better before I started taking the damn drugs. Both hands now are badly affected, my left middle finger looks like it's about to burst and strangely enough the very top joint, near the nail, is now red, hot, swollen and painful despite RA allegedly not supposing to affect those top joints.

I've a two week wait to see the nurse but at this rate I won't be able to drive there, that's for sure. I didn't expect a miracle cure but I certainly didn't expect to get bloody worse!

I have meniers as well .I have had an op done by mr Moffett at Addenbrookes which had the leading clinc for meniers .These days the same affcet is done by putting a chemail in your ear .Which works as well as my 3 hour op .I have not had an acctack for 14 years in the 90s there where 3 ops you could have one being a shunt put in and one servering the nerves to the brain and one taking the middle of ear out .
Have something done as its the most alfull thing i have ever had in my life .aS NOTHING worse then being out then falling down ( i had it bad ) and being sick .And my balance was also affceted i would have none and could not stand up .

Mr Moffett put a mico hole in my ear he was going to put a shunt in and found the inside of the ear was deformed so he did something else .
This has worked very well .But ent tells me there are so many new things done in out patants now 15 yrs later
Christine

Hi Mairead,

Think we can all sympathise with your statement about never appreciating your health and so on!

It could be the MTX causing the healing problem but more than likely it is the steroid. It was probably the reason you initially felt so much better as well. Strange drug, it makes you feel so much better but is damaging as well!

Whatever, I hope that the cause of all your problems is soon found and you can be helped to be much better.

Take care,

Eleanor x